of equations and constant variables - of being high on life


The sky turns to gray, then lavender, then black. The distant concrete jungle becomes a silhouette.

Curled inside a love-made blanket with my feet tucked in and the kick-ass 2 year old for a companion, I can feel my breath catch in my ribs. I’m always close to tears, this week and happy! Go figure!

The time is both luxury and limitation. I want all of it, this glorious mess called life and love. Drinking hungrily on the syrup like a humming bird!  

Being a full time mom while doing a full time school and working full time, catches my breath… the fatigue has now become second nature. Here and now, am in love, like never before!

Some days it’s fire, some days it the hose! It’s messy and it’s magic.

It’s brutal and brilliant.

The night arrives softly, filled with the trilling of cicadas and the soundless fluttering of moths wings. I have been exceptionally thin skinned lately...

But, then, am becoming adept at being a bad-ass mommy!  This almost-balance, this in-motion, this push-pull, this abundance of giggles, even the melt-down tantrums, makes me what I am!

A list of little boy awesomeness:

* Mud and dirt is meant to be played in. Let him. Let the laundry pile up. No one will remember clean laundry; mud monsters on the other hand: totally epic.

* Extra bubbles in the bathtub. So what if his hair doesn’t ever get perfectly clean? There’s always next time.

* Make soup. A 2 yr. old can do a number on lettuce with a butter knife. Also: they’re more careful than you’d think, and growing boys who turn into men who can cook = lovely.

* New couches are overrated. Keep the one you have. Buy throw pillows. Let him throw. Up and down. Science happens here!

* Chocolates called by their shapes. Let him make a mess, click pictures! Extra tissue papers  + a little water works wonder.

* Match box cars, pint sized super heroes, board books. Classic!

* Say yes. Keep videos on loop and let him mouth the dialogues and songs. Cheer with him if he likes something.

A gleeful 2 year olds laugh ringing through your apartment is worth anything under the sun!

 Copyright © Neerja Yadav

4 comments:

Margie said...

I've said it before and I'll say it again, 'magical' writing!

Happy New Year, dear friend!
So nice to know someone as special as you!

Margie x

Skip said...

Aww. Happiness.

Da Rodent said...

Total happyness :)

Happy new year Neers. Wishing you an awesome year ahead..

Gypsie Spirit said...

You are such a kickass mother, to an awesome man (well, he is 2 yrs, thats almost "man")! :)
And, happy new year!
love x