the very un-baroqueness of life



I’m still crossing my fingers; trying to remember that everything is good right now. That life is good. But still, I can’t help wanting what I don’t have. 

He has been a bit unwell, with fever rimmed playfulness; now boisterous and talkative and now dull and a bit dusted. My heart feels like the tangled strings.

He is four something and already has a mind of his own; we know this as parents, yet it surprises us… the little warm fuzzy thing all dependant on you for the slightest movement; now can and does ask you to leave him alone.

The parabola of the want of Mommy and Mommy please go, too is dynamic. The mood, the weather, the need, the want, the people around…. Anything and everything can and will act as gravity and air drag.

No one warned me that you stop being everything that a day comes when your kiss no longer makes it better.
Yet, in between the combiflam and comforter; we somehow get through the day and even managed to dunk ourselves in squeals of silly laughter.

And, suddenly heavy lidded and a bit blocked nose… he dozes off. Don’t they look ethereal while asleep… and my heart breaks again with love and pain beyond comprehension…

Did not indulge in the customary year end or the New Year post! Though the first hours of this year were as fantastic as could be… I have been in that in-between phase of melting and frozen brains

Enough! Hope everyone is happy and well and lovely and possibly less haze-stupored than I.

Copyright © Neerja Yadav

p.s: A very Happy New Year to all of you! Please know that even though I do not publish all the comments and maybe am erratic in dropping by to say hello! I think of you espand thank you for being there and around!

3 comments:

GYPSIE SPIRIT said...

Happy New Year lovely!

Margie said...

I can't believe he is 4 already, give him a hug from me.

Happy and wonderful New Year to all of you,
May you be blessed.

xo

Saurabh Banerjee said...

Ying and the Yang.